Did you know that even existed? I did not until today. Anticipatory grief or expected grief is grieving a loss before the loss happens.
After the death of a loved one, society has cultural norms about how to response. There are even widely recognized steps in the grieving process. According to the booklet I was given today, "Society does not fully understand and recognize expected grief, so it is not clear how we are suppose to act and feel (p.2)."
My mother is under hospice care, and this booklet gave credibility to the range of emotions I have seen in myself and my family. This quote on page 7 puts so much in perspective. "One moment you may be giving them permission to die and in the next you may be encouraging them to take another sip of juice (to live)." (My emphasis added.)
The writer of the booklet even quoted Edgar Allen Poe and his experience with his wife. I have though very little about that writer since high school English class. "Nevermore," said in a scary deep voice. Never though I would have something in common with him.
Source: Anticipatory Grief: Expecting The Loss, Feeling The Pain by Marty Hogan, LCSW, MSW
Thursday, September 24, 2015
Wednesday, September 23, 2015
The Candy Man
My daughter has been asking to buy some of the Brookside candies. I told her she would have to wait because they are expensive. Several weeks have past and every time I saw that candy I though of her request. I received a coupon from CVS for the $2 off candy pouches on Monday, and this week they even have the Brookside brand on sale. I was happy. I can purchase them for that price. My daughter will be thrilled.
Then out of the blue the thought came ... that is like God. He knows the right time to answer prayers. My daughter probably only saw my answer as a "No." She did not know how often I thought about her want and my desire to fill it. God knows the big picture (just like my finances) and he too longs to give me good gifts even though I too don't see it (just like me with my daughter's request).
Now that the right time (i.e. the right price) has come I get to buy the candy for my daughter. God knows all the circumstances around our requests, and he too waits for the best and right time to answer.
I am going to buy that candy today, and I see the goodness of God and his love for me just a little clearer!
Then out of the blue the thought came ... that is like God. He knows the right time to answer prayers. My daughter probably only saw my answer as a "No." She did not know how often I thought about her want and my desire to fill it. God knows the big picture (just like my finances) and he too longs to give me good gifts even though I too don't see it (just like me with my daughter's request).
Now that the right time (i.e. the right price) has come I get to buy the candy for my daughter. God knows all the circumstances around our requests, and he too waits for the best and right time to answer.
I am going to buy that candy today, and I see the goodness of God and his love for me just a little clearer!
Thursday, September 17, 2015
The Doctor is In
Here is yesterday's "show stopper" from the Joyce Meyer study. It is her interpretation of Proverbs 23:7.
For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.
She says on page 27 that our thoughts are so powerful that they have creative ability. As I reflected on that statement, I shook my head to clear the cob webs. Your thoughts ... they can make something? My previous view was that they affect (to act upon or have an influence on) you in some way, not that they create. My thoughts have the ability to create what I say and what I do. They effect me. They bring about or create. That IS powerful.
Again I see the sheer need to be in God's word. A few days ago it was to gain wisdom, knowledge and understanding. Now it is to develop right thinking to create right actions. But, did I get up when my alarm went off to do today's study? No. I hit the snooze a few times and then turned the clock off completely. I missed another morning to gain.
Meyer even goes as far to say that right thinking compares to a heartbeat or blood pressure. We call these indicators vital signs. Right thinking is vital to our spiritual life.
Watching vitals signs is one indicator of coming death. I know that "watch" right now with my Mom. Maybe that is why the analogy stuck a cord with me. Do you want an indicator of your spiritual vitals? Take note of what are you speaking out to friends, family or even yourself. We speak out loud what we think.
I have one of those to work on. I also must go to bed earlier so that I am not so tired to miss my "morning meeting."
For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.
She says on page 27 that our thoughts are so powerful that they have creative ability. As I reflected on that statement, I shook my head to clear the cob webs. Your thoughts ... they can make something? My previous view was that they affect (to act upon or have an influence on) you in some way, not that they create. My thoughts have the ability to create what I say and what I do. They effect me. They bring about or create. That IS powerful.
Again I see the sheer need to be in God's word. A few days ago it was to gain wisdom, knowledge and understanding. Now it is to develop right thinking to create right actions. But, did I get up when my alarm went off to do today's study? No. I hit the snooze a few times and then turned the clock off completely. I missed another morning to gain.
Meyer even goes as far to say that right thinking compares to a heartbeat or blood pressure. We call these indicators vital signs. Right thinking is vital to our spiritual life.
Watching vitals signs is one indicator of coming death. I know that "watch" right now with my Mom. Maybe that is why the analogy stuck a cord with me. Do you want an indicator of your spiritual vitals? Take note of what are you speaking out to friends, family or even yourself. We speak out loud what we think.
I have one of those to work on. I also must go to bed earlier so that I am not so tired to miss my "morning meeting."
Thursday, September 10, 2015
Who is Winning?
I started a new Bible study today. It is Battlefield of the Mind Strategy Guide by Joyce Meyer. My Mom had it in her stack of books so I thought I would give it a go. Day One yielded two new insights.
One, Myer's translation of Mark 4:42 stopped me in my tracks. "The measure [thought and study] you give [to the truth you hear] will be the measure [of virtue and knowledge] that comes back to you (p.10)." The amount of time I spend in God's word is exactly how much wisdom I get. Why do I stay in the bed in the mornings? I am limiting myself!
The second one is what I saw in 1 Corinthians 10:13 for the first time. She asked on page 18, "What does this verse say about God and the temptations and trials we encounter while tearing down strongholds?" I had always read it from my perspective, not about God.
No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
I already knew about the way of escape being made. But this is what I put together for the first time ... God is faithful!!! It is written right there in the middle of the verse and in the middle of any trial or temptation!!!! GOD IS FAITHFUL. He understands all of the enemies schemes. He understands the "common to man" stuff all the way to the cosmic powers (Ephesians 6:12)! AND, He protects me. He knows my limits. He has the enemy under his control even to the limits of the temptation. He is in complete control.
I wonder what tomorrow will hold. I had better get up!!! I need more God.
One, Myer's translation of Mark 4:42 stopped me in my tracks. "The measure [thought and study] you give [to the truth you hear] will be the measure [of virtue and knowledge] that comes back to you (p.10)." The amount of time I spend in God's word is exactly how much wisdom I get. Why do I stay in the bed in the mornings? I am limiting myself!
The second one is what I saw in 1 Corinthians 10:13 for the first time. She asked on page 18, "What does this verse say about God and the temptations and trials we encounter while tearing down strongholds?" I had always read it from my perspective, not about God.
No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.
I already knew about the way of escape being made. But this is what I put together for the first time ... God is faithful!!! It is written right there in the middle of the verse and in the middle of any trial or temptation!!!! GOD IS FAITHFUL. He understands all of the enemies schemes. He understands the "common to man" stuff all the way to the cosmic powers (Ephesians 6:12)! AND, He protects me. He knows my limits. He has the enemy under his control even to the limits of the temptation. He is in complete control.
I wonder what tomorrow will hold. I had better get up!!! I need more God.
Tuesday, September 8, 2015
Nonsense and Bible Study Recap
I am here! I remembered to do it. Thank you, Lord, for reminding me.
I really have nothing to share. I had a good time in the word of God this morning. I have had several dreams and gained some understanding of them. Used my homemade deodorant and keep thinking someone might enjoy the recipe some day. Cut my knuckle creating spaghetti noodles out of a zucchini.
Oh yea, I remember now, I was going to update you on our Bible Studies since last summer. Let's see. ...
Well, several days and the holiday weekend came and went since I started this post. Finally got back to it today. Our group completed the following two studies. Both were repeats for me but as usual with God the student still has much to learn.
Here and Now...There and Then by Beth Moore is a lecture series on the book of Revelation. Beth presents many points of view, allowing women to decide for themselves when the interpretation varies among scholars. She teaches that God is as specific about what He does reveal as He is about what He does not reveal. Each of the 11 sessions is approximately 1 hour and 15 minutes. The set includes 11 DVDs and one listening guide with light homework.
Thanks, Lifeway, for the images and descriptions.
The Revelation study has taken this little group full circle back to where we started in that hotel exercise room freezing in the cold. I am pondering what will come next.
I really have nothing to share. I had a good time in the word of God this morning. I have had several dreams and gained some understanding of them. Used my homemade deodorant and keep thinking someone might enjoy the recipe some day. Cut my knuckle creating spaghetti noodles out of a zucchini.
Oh yea, I remember now, I was going to update you on our Bible Studies since last summer. Let's see. ...
Well, several days and the holiday weekend came and went since I started this post. Finally got back to it today. Our group completed the following two studies. Both were repeats for me but as usual with God the student still has much to learn.
Here and Now...There and Then by Beth Moore is a lecture series on the book of Revelation. Beth presents many points of view, allowing women to decide for themselves when the interpretation varies among scholars. She teaches that God is as specific about what He does reveal as He is about what He does not reveal. Each of the 11 sessions is approximately 1 hour and 15 minutes. The set includes 11 DVDs and one listening guide with light homework.
Thanks, Lifeway, for the images and descriptions.
The Revelation study has taken this little group full circle back to where we started in that hotel exercise room freezing in the cold. I am pondering what will come next.
Wednesday, September 2, 2015
Walking on Water
Tips for When You're Walking on Water
"So He said, "Come." And when Peter had come down out of the boat, he walked on the water to go to Jesus. But when he saw that the wind was boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink he cried out, saying, "Lord, save me!" Matthew 14:29, 30
As followers of Jesus Christ, we have experiences when we "step out in faith." The account of Peter getting out of the boat and stepping into the rough waters is surely a great example for us to use as we go through life.
Peter was the only one who stepped out in faith on that stormy night. We also will find ourselves in that same lonely place at times. God will call us through His Word, just like Jesus called Peter to come. But we may be the only one. Our friends may be content with business as usual. Our family members may be willing to just stay in the boat. But meanwhile, we will hear the voice of the Lord telling us to step out in faith.
The Scripture doesn't say how the others reacted when Peter first got out of the boat. But it's totally plausible that they tried to keep him from stepping out. After all, they were sitting there frightened from the storm and scared of the sight of Jesus who they thought was a ghost.
But Peter heard the voice and he stepped out anyway . . . he paid no attention to the voices in the background. He only listened to the voice of the Lord.
Peter did fine, until he got his eyes back on the circumstances of the boisterous waves. Then he abandoned his faith and took up fear . . . that's when he started sinking. It was the fear that put him back in the clutches of the world and its deadly consequences.
Peter could have gone with the fear, but it was his faith in Jesus that got him back on track! Even while he was sinking he stirred up his faith again and called out to the Lord. The Lord rebuked Peter for his lack of faith (a rebuke means "sharp words to cause correction") and then reached out and pulled him up so he could continue in his walk of faith.
We are faced with times when we must step out in faith. These are the times when we must keep our ears and eyes open to the Lord and Him only. We cannot let negative voices, unbelieving comments, or stormy circumstances drown out the Word of the Lord.
The storms will come, but Christ will always be there for us. We must look to Him, ask Him to show us what to do, and when He does, we must confidently step out in faith and walk in the Spirit. If we make a mistake and fall back, we need only to call upon the Lord, take corrective measures, and continue our walk on to victory and success!
The above devotional is by Susan Gregory, the author of The Daniel Fast at daniel-fast.com. I have shared it with my husband and daughter because it gave me new thoughts on this story from scripture. I never thought about the other disciples in the boat, and I had never thought about the victory Peter had. I have heard teaching after teaching about Peter's failure to keep his eyes on Jesus.
But, People, he did it. He did it. You may be thinking "Yea. Yea at the beginning."
No. What stuck me today was after the failure. He walked with Jesus back to the boat! That is how we are meant to do it. To walk with Jesus. With Jesus!
Yes, Lord, here I am again failing to do what I feel you asked me to do. Help me to have faith that this blog will turn out well because all I see is being hurt by it.
Peter was the only one who stepped out in faith on that stormy night. We also will find ourselves in that same lonely place at times. God will call us through His Word, just like Jesus called Peter to come. But we may be the only one. Our friends may be content with business as usual. Our family members may be willing to just stay in the boat. But meanwhile, we will hear the voice of the Lord telling us to step out in faith.
The Scripture doesn't say how the others reacted when Peter first got out of the boat. But it's totally plausible that they tried to keep him from stepping out. After all, they were sitting there frightened from the storm and scared of the sight of Jesus who they thought was a ghost.
But Peter heard the voice and he stepped out anyway . . . he paid no attention to the voices in the background. He only listened to the voice of the Lord.
Peter did fine, until he got his eyes back on the circumstances of the boisterous waves. Then he abandoned his faith and took up fear . . . that's when he started sinking. It was the fear that put him back in the clutches of the world and its deadly consequences.
Peter could have gone with the fear, but it was his faith in Jesus that got him back on track! Even while he was sinking he stirred up his faith again and called out to the Lord. The Lord rebuked Peter for his lack of faith (a rebuke means "sharp words to cause correction") and then reached out and pulled him up so he could continue in his walk of faith.
We are faced with times when we must step out in faith. These are the times when we must keep our ears and eyes open to the Lord and Him only. We cannot let negative voices, unbelieving comments, or stormy circumstances drown out the Word of the Lord.
The storms will come, but Christ will always be there for us. We must look to Him, ask Him to show us what to do, and when He does, we must confidently step out in faith and walk in the Spirit. If we make a mistake and fall back, we need only to call upon the Lord, take corrective measures, and continue our walk on to victory and success!
The above devotional is by Susan Gregory, the author of The Daniel Fast at daniel-fast.com. I have shared it with my husband and daughter because it gave me new thoughts on this story from scripture. I never thought about the other disciples in the boat, and I had never thought about the victory Peter had. I have heard teaching after teaching about Peter's failure to keep his eyes on Jesus.
But, People, he did it. He did it. You may be thinking "Yea. Yea at the beginning."
No. What stuck me today was after the failure. He walked with Jesus back to the boat! That is how we are meant to do it. To walk with Jesus. With Jesus!
Yes, Lord, here I am again failing to do what I feel you asked me to do. Help me to have faith that this blog will turn out well because all I see is being hurt by it.
AAUGH ...
Just this morning (August 24) I was praying for someone and told the Lord I understood because I had done the same things, and we both needed His help.
I said, "Remind me, Lord, of what I need to finish." What was the first thing to come to my mind. Aaugh ... this blog. So here I am committing to write an entry every day for the next 39 days.
After I worked through those same old fearful thoughts that I have written about before, I remembered the suggestion Beth Moore gave at the start of her lecture series on Revelation to journal each day where you saw the Lord. I think I will try that for these entries.
I never got back to this to post what I wrote, and here it is September 2.
Day 38 - Failure
Day 37 - Failure
Day 36 - Failure
Day 35 - Failure
Day 34 - Failure
Day 33 - Failure
Day 32 - Failure
Day 30 - Failure
Aaugh!
I said, "Remind me, Lord, of what I need to finish." What was the first thing to come to my mind. Aaugh ... this blog. So here I am committing to write an entry every day for the next 39 days.
After I worked through those same old fearful thoughts that I have written about before, I remembered the suggestion Beth Moore gave at the start of her lecture series on Revelation to journal each day where you saw the Lord. I think I will try that for these entries.
I never got back to this to post what I wrote, and here it is September 2.
Day 38 - Failure
Day 37 - Failure
Day 36 - Failure
Day 35 - Failure
Day 34 - Failure
Day 33 - Failure
Day 32 - Failure
Day 30 - Failure
Aaugh!
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